After being bullied by the internet or causing their own publicity stunt, Marvel has finally released the first trailer for Spider-Man: No Way Home, the third movie in the home saga. I did not expect to be excited over a trailer for a movie that we already know 75% of what’s going to happen in the movie, but Marvel perseveres because nothing matters except the next thing. Things we have expected were there. Nothing is entirely shocking if you have an internet connection, but there’s just something exciting about finally actually seeing it all. With all that said, here are five or so thoughts on Spider-Man: No Way Home.
Doctor Strange: what are you doing?
Doctor Strange trick y’all. Someone had to take the mantle of supreme fuck up from the deceased Tony Stark, and that person is Stephen Strange. Everything Stark did in his run was destructive and led to most of the conflicts in the Avengers movies. Stark had an arrogance and vanity that gave him a misplaced savior complex combined with trauma from his parents and an alien invasion etc — you know the story. Doctor Strange doesn’t have any of that and is just like, sure, let’s mess reality up as a little treat. Wong is wise but constantly searching for food, and leaving Strange to his own devices seems like an oversight by the Sorcerer Supreme’s right hand. Somebody had to replace Stark as the MCU’s screw-up, and Sherlock is that guy pal.
JB Smoove’s drive-by spoilers
JB Smoove was in the news because he nonchalantly named dropped Tobey Maguire as the Spider-Man he’s most excited to see in Spider-Man: No Way Home. Marvel probably sent a team of assassins to make sure nothing else slipped, but it’s JB Smoove, and he’s going to cook regardless of what you throw at him. Outside of “spoiling” Tobey’s Spider-Man, Andrew Garfield also got hit with some inadvertent strays. There was no hesitation or thought in JB’s answer, just pure instinct, and he may not even know who Andrew Garfield is. There were no other Spider-Men in the trailer, but they are coming. Marvel put months of resources into dragging Tobey Maguire out of a high-stakes underground poker ring so he could spend a couple of weeks in Atlanta, so it better be worth it.
Return of the king
Alfred Molina is back. The Sam Raimi Spider-Man movies are pound for pound some of if not the best comic book movies in the entire spectrum of costumed people fighting each other. They are nostalgic for me, even the third one — I can remember walking out of the theater as a kid thinking, “that was was the best movie I’ve ever seen.” Spider-Man 2 is the one, though, and it’s because of Alfred Molina, who is incredible. He embodies everything that makes a Spider-Man villain compelling. He is charming and a mirror to a version of Peter Parker that Peter thinks he could be one day, making his fall into villainy legitimately tragic. Molina is one of a kind, and even if he ultimately is rendered less than in the MCU, the entire world is happy to see him back. Speaking of villains…
We can rule this city, Spida-man!
I get cynical about the MCU because I care. Nothing snapped me out of my Marvel-induced malaise than hearing William Dafoe laugh for five seconds as the Green Goblin. What a psycho, both the character and actor. Seeing Dafoe back and hopefully as a complete lunatic again is enough for me. Combine that with just the novelty of multiple Spider-People and Doc Ock and Marvel Attempting to make one of the worst storylines in the comics actually good, and I’m excited for the movie for what it is. I’m learning to accept what is and not care about what’s next, and that’s a clarifying attitude that doesn’t even register to most people consuming what is now the primary genre of stories.
I wish they would slow down
My biggest problem with this iteration of Spider-Man is the speed at which they moved Peter Parker’s story along. The best part of Spider-Man is seeing him develop as a hero. He’s a kid that goes through things that define him. The street-level aspect of spiderman, fighting his specific rouges gallery, seeing him try and balance his life at home, school, and being a horny teenager. Those are the defining things about spider-man which have made him the icon he is. His story never gets old because there is always an audience that can relate o it. The MCU has leaped past all that, and it’s understandable from the way they position stories: it’s not about the story itself but what the story means to what’s coming next. Peter was positioned as the heir apparent to Tony Stark, catapulting him from neighborhood hero to one of the most important individuals in the world of the MCU. Revealing his identity seemed shortsighted, and this movie might be a sneaky way to correct that decision. I wish they could slow down and tell a more grounded Peter Parker and Spider-Man story rather than another team-up movie to position the next movie coming afterward. With all that being said, it looks sick, and I will be there opening night.
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